Yesterday, Ryan and I took Anberlin and Liam to get their first
haircuts. I was kinda dreading this event. I was sure one or both would
end up in tears. Anberlin really doesn't like me touching her hair, so I
was very unsure if she would let a stranger touch her head at all. Surprisingly, she did great! Liam on the other hand was uneasy, but we made it through without any tears from the kids. In my case, I had to hold back a few tears because I am realizing how fast my children are growing and remember that not long ago they were both so tiny.
After we were finished chopping off hair, we went to the park and had some fun. Even at the park there were times, when I couldn't believe my children are as old as they are now. I love my little family so much! I know this post doesn't have a lot to it. But, some of you will understand how I am feeling right now and I hope you enjoyed this special moment in our lives. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers!
Recently, my best friend is going through a loss she thought she would never have to experience. She lost her son almost 3 months ago. I would like to express my gratefulness for this child and tell others how his life has impacted mine.
I will love Judah Nathan for many things. I probably won't/ can't list them all, but here are a few. I love him for the bond and relationship that he created for me and his mother. I will be forever be grateful for that and for the relationship his mother and I have now. I love him for the sweet little boy that he is because of the love I have for his parents and who they are. I love him for helping love my children better and for learning that each moment is precious. I will also love him for helping me come closer to God. This may not be a lot to some, but my heart is forever changed. I thank God for the blessing Judah Nathan is to me and others.
I will forever cherish the picture his mother sent to me on his birthday. I can't believe how much I loved this little boy without ever meeting him. I struggle sometimes with questions that can't be answer until I go to heaven as well, but I have hope that I will see this little boy when I am finally there. I pray for his mother and father because I know they long even more to hold him more than I do. I pray that God will give them peace, comfort, and hope.
These past few weeks have been crazy, actually the past few months and it is only the beginning. I started graduate school on August 30th and I was surprised how much I still like school. I have always liked school. I don't always like homework, but I like going to school. Hopefully, I will have keep this positive attitude through out school. My projected graduation date is May 2014.
Our family is definitely going through many areas of stress, but stress creates growth. Ryan is training for his new job as a bus driver and will be driving starting in October. There are also new groups that I belong to now to meet new people and grow spiritually, socially, and emotionally. But with that creates anxiety for me, especially with my schedule and the kids schedule.
So please pray for peace, comfort, and health for our family this month. Pray that God would give us wisdom and peace. Pray that we will adjust to our new schedules well and that we figure out how to maximize our family time together. Also, pray for our church and the up coming fall season and that we see people come to Christ, who provides the ultimate peace and love. Thank you for taking the time to read this!
I'm sure I am leaving out a lot. Hopefully, I will have another post soon (like next week).
Well, It has been two years since I have added a new post. My last tweet was "Anberlin gets to come home tomorrow". Wow! How life gets busy with kids. I can't believe my tiny Anberlin is two years old. I decided to start blogging again to help me remember my kids being small and the fun times we have. I already have a bad memory, so I am hoping this helps.
So with that said, I will also keep using this blog for ways others can pray for me and my family. Also, for some other things as well. I am not sure I can fit a review of the last two years on one post. Hopefully, that means many posts this month, but with life the way it is you never know.
But the most important things that happen in the last two years were that Anberlin was born four pounds, nine ounces on July 27, 2010.
And, Liam was born six pounds, four ounces on December 27, 2011.
Oh, how I love being a mom! God has really blessed me with two great children!
Ways you can pray for our family are pray for wisdom, strength, faith, and health in the coming weeks. Many things are changing and it will be interesting to see how God has these things turn out. Thank you for taking time to read this. God bless!
Apparently, Anberlin is going to be a July baby. After the doctor's appointments this week, Anberlin is now weighing 3lbs and the doctors believe that because of her size that she should be delivered early at 37 weeks. So the plan is right now is to have a procedure done called an amniocentesis on July 15th to test if her lungs are mature and if they are, I will be induced, but if she is in stress while I'm in labor they would then do a Cesarean. So it looks like she will be born on either July 15th or July 16th. Please pray for me and Anberlin during these last few weeks and that everything will go well on the 15th. Thank you so much and I love you all!
Ryan and I went to the doctor today for an ultrasound to check Anberlin's growth and she is still measuring small, about 2 weeks. My placenta is doing an ok job for now, but they are still going to see me twice a week to following the blood flow and growth closely and if the environment for Anberlin gets worse then she will have to come out early and this is why I am being closely monitored. They are wanting to find markers that tell them to deliver her early and markers that it is ok to keep her in. Also, being on bed rest is no fun and I have other stress going on at the same time. Not being able to go to things that I really never wanted to miss, really stinks. Anyways, I would appreciate any prayer for Anberlin and I.
So yesterday I went in for routine testing that I will have every Tuesday and Friday for Anberlin. I had a ultrasound just for blood flow and fluid check. Everything looked good there and the doctor sent me to the second part of the appointment, which is the non stress test and check my heartbeat, the baby's heartbeat, and stress on my uterus. Well, during this second appointment the nurse was explaining why the test was being done and what it was checking, during this time I was laying on my back too long. This caused me to block blood flow to me and the baby, which then made the baby's heartbeat dangerously low for about 7 minutes and they whisked me to the OR just in case they need to take Anberlin out and revive her. Very scary I have to say, but we made it there quick and I knew Anberlin was God's hands, so I wasn't too freaked out, I actually felt taken care of at that time, which was probably good for Anberlin's condition at the time. I was kept overnight at the hospital to make sure that laying on my back or Anberlin rolling on to the cord was the problem and not something more serious, we were able to go home at 4:00 the next day. Anyways, keep Anberlin and I in your prayers and pray that she stays in for at least 10 more weeks!
Thanks for reading my blog and getting an update on the baby. Ryan and I went to a specialist on Thursday, April 22nd and after meeting with a specialist I was put on bed rest. I was put on bed rest because from what we got on Thursday is that my placenta is not allowing enough nutrients, blood, oxygen to the baby and it has affected her growth, making her measure about 3 weeks smaller than she should be. We are going to see a specialist every week and have an ultrasound every week also to watch her growth, fluids, and blood flow from the placenta to baby. Your prayers for her health and growth is appreciated at this time and that I won't go crazy on bed rest. There will probably be weekly updates on the baby and myself, since I am out of school and on bed rest. In addition, I believe Ryan and I have decided to name our baby girl Anberlin, but it could change when I meet her, but more than likely she will be Anberlin. God bless.
The last two months have been a little challenging around our house, but not too bad. I had to get used to my routine of school, now I only have ten weeks left! Also, this month someone stole my wallet which was no fun, just a inconvenience. First, I am excited that my cousin Amanda had her baby boy Caleb! My birthday was pretty good thanks to all my friends and family, until I got an allergic reaction on Ryan's birthday. That was no fun at all.Hopefully it doesn't happen again.
Ryan and I heard the baby's heart beat at our last visit and I am starting to feel the baby move, which is weird and exciting at the same time. Our next appointment will be March 9th and we will be able to find out with we are having a boy or a girl if the baby corporates. Now Ryan and I are discussing names, but it will be much easier once I know to focus my attention on either boy names or girl names.
Church has been going... I can't wait for it to be spring, I feel like there will much more going on and more opportunities. I know I definitely need prayers in this area, especially since most of my teachers will be having babies this summer or moving. Thank you for praying for me and thinking of me. Keep praying school will go well these last 10 weeks. Also, pray for Ryan's and my health, it seems one of us is sick every other week.
I will update this probably on March 9th after the appointment.
Well, God has pretty much told us to wait to adopt, because Ryan and I are expecting a bundle of joy in early August. I have been feeling fine and I am very thankful that I have not yet experienced morning sickness. I am very tired, but that pretty much comes with the territory. I will keep you updated with Baby Fillinger in this coming year.
School went well this semester. The last two weeks were really tough, especially because I was really tired and it was hard to focus. I ended up with really good grades, better than I expected. Thank you for praying for me and please continue to pray that school goes well next semester. I will have my own case load or foster family next semester, so I will definitely need pray next semester.
Thank you to everyone who has been following my blog and praying for me. Ryan and I will be in Arkansas for Christmas. I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!! Also, another update is available at Show Hope. http://blog.showhope.org/
Hello everyone! Ryan and I had a great time in Nashville! After our weekend in Nashville, I felt after all the information and prayer that my life would not be the same and that change is definitely coming soon. Also, as I write this I know of some other couples in my family that their lives will also change. I want to say congratulations to Adam and Hayden Norwood on their new baby, who will be born later today. In addition, I also want to congratulate Amanda and Brandon Hunt who will soon have their baby boy at the beginning of next year. In Nashville, Ryan and I attended a seminar on adoption and learned a lot. The most inspiring thing was meeting other families who have already adopted. The entire weekend I had to make sure I packed my waterproof mascara because at any given moment God would speak to me either through someone's presentation or through the eyes of a child. Nevertheless, after this weekend, I wanted to adopt a child even more, I just want to know when Ryan and I should adopt. This is going to be Ryan's and my prayer for the next several months. Please pray that God will give us wisdom in this area. Also, if we do decide to adopt soon, we need to chose country's program, we will also need prayer in this area. Some programs we are not eligible for because of our age and or amount of time we have been married. So, don't be surprised when Ryan and I adopt from China when we are thirty.
As for the church, we are reframing how we reach our community in how we use small groups. Please pray that God will bless our church and that this new structure to groups will bring new believers to Christ through relationships. Please keep me in your prayers with the children's ministry, it is hard being a full time student with an internship and running a children's ministry. In addition, school has been going really well. I have received very good grades this semester and I feel even closer in working in the adoption/foster care field with having almost half of the year over with. Pray that school keeps going well and that I keep my sanity.
This Thanksgiving break could not have come at a better time.
Thank you for taking your time to read this and pray for me.
This is Kevin, who is living at Maria's Big House of Hope. I love seeing these updates on children at MBHOH. It's amazing what a difference a month in a caring environment can make. I am so happy to be a part of this and would love to one day work for this organization. Seeing Kevin's progress gives me more incentive and motivation to finish my degree. School has been really challenging lately and I have 8 papers due in 6 weeks. Please pray that I can finish all my work and still be sane. I am excited about Nashville, because Ryan and I will visit Show Hope's office and get more information about adoption and how we can involve our church in caring for orphans. Also, coming up soon is a fall festival our church is having. Please pray that everything will come together and that people will come. Thank you to everyone who reads my blog and prays for me. If you want to read about other residents of MBHOH, go to http://blog.showhope.org/
This week is almost over and I have made it to the end of the quarter. Finals are next week, so I will be studying a lot and I am going to try and get the children's ministry stuff moved to the new church office this Friday. I have not been feeling too well lately and I am probably going to have to go to a doctor next week, please pray that I can feel better soon. Hopefully, Ryan and I can actually do something together this weekend that doesn't have to do with work or school. I might also finish painting some of the bedrooms in the house.
Ryan and I heard back from Show Hope and they couldn't tell us anymore about her surgery and you cannot predetermine a child for adoption. I knew this, but I thought maybe since she was special needs there would be a difference, but there is not. It doesn't hurt to ask, please pray that she will be well enough for adoption and she will become a part of a forever family. So at this time Ryan and I will not be starting the adoption process. We will be praying about what we should do next.'
Some of you know this, but I don't think everyone does. I went into social work, because I want to work in adoption or orphan care. So hopefully, by the time I graduate I will be able to find a job in these areas. I am not sure if I will want to work for the agency that I am doing my internship with since it deals mostly with foster care, but it is another area I am interested in working. Also, if anyone would like to come to my graduation it is May 1st, just let me know. Please keep praying for Ryan and I, about our financial situation, church, perseverance to finish school, and about adoption. Thank you everyone for taking time to read this and to pray for us!
Over the past few months, Ryan and I have been following an organization called Show Hope, that has recently opened an orphanage in China. The orphanage is called Maria's Big House of Hope which is named after the Christian singer Steven Curtis Chapman's daughter. Their cause is very close to Ryan's and my heart. The girl in the picture is one of the residents of Maria's Big House of Hope (MBHOH).
In November, Ryan and I are going to Nashville, TN to Steven Curtis Chapman's home church for Orphan Sunday and we are going to visit Show Hope's office while we are there. Ryan and I have thought and prayed about building our family through adoption. We feel we have been called to adopt. The girl in the picture of the last post, we have expressed interest in adopting her, but we do not think she is well enough to be considered for adoption. To read more about her, go to http://blog.showhope.org/?p=424 If we cannot adopt now, we will someday soon. Here is another post from the show hope blog, The joy of laughter was a sweet gift to the Upton’s as they traveled to China to meet their daughter, Haddie. Her contagious giggle erupted even at the first tickles from Bob and Collette. While still in Guangzhou, they shot this video to share a portrait of hope with their children Noah and Hannah who were waiting in the United States. At home now, Haddie loves to sleep in the arms of her mom and dad and is bonding with her forever family! Thanks to all the sponsors and supporters who helped give this precious child such amazing joy.
Thank you to everyone who have been praying for us. In the recent months, people are being more positive about Vertical and we made it through the first month without my paycheck, and school hasn't been as bad but I have a tough week coming up with two papers due soon and then I have finals for this quarter. Please keep praying for our schedules, they are still crazy, and please pray for our church. Thank you for taking time to read this, and maybe to watch a few videos. To find out more about Show Hope, go to www.showhope.org . God bless.
I finally found some time to update my blog. I hope everyone hasn't given up on me. School has been very very harsh and I pretty much have no life, but writing papers. I believe it will get better though, I think September is going to be my busiest month. I love that the weather, it is getting cooler, Fall is my favorite season. I am trying to make sure I enjoy it more this year. Lately, I have been missing things about Arkansas, not the humidity of course, but camping trips with my family, fish frys, my cousins(all of them, not just Arkansasans) and just familiar faces and places. This is probably one of the hardest months I will go through, please pray for me as I go through this season of my life. Ryan also needs prayer, because he is just as busy as I am, he works 60 to 80 hours a week. Life is pretty crazy around our house. I tried to find a picture that I could put on here, but we haven't really taken any lately, so I will leave you with a picture of a little girl that has captured our hearts. I will tell everyone more about what she is all about in another post and why Ryan and I will be going to Nashville,TN in November. Please leave a comment or email me!
I want to say thank you again to everyone who said they would pray for me! The last few days have been pretty rough, but there have been a few things that have been really good. John and Courtney Mills have come back to Colorado and he has also found of job! They are definitely a blessing to everyone here in Colorado. Also, the church just bought a new, big trailer to haul everything. Our attendance Sunday was also great and many others that were gone for the summer came back.
This was great to see everyone back, but these last few days have been rough on me. I have just been thinking about how busy I am going to be this year and it gets to me. I'm trying not to worry about money at all, actually I would say it would be #4 on my worry list. #1 would have to be my position at the church. I need prayer that I stay positive about myself and my volunteers, and that people will volunteer. My biggest enemy right now is negativity and others having nothing nice to say. I don't think they realize that everytime something is said about Vertical it is negative, but it is all that has been happening. With this being said, pray that I handle the negativity better or more positive things will be said. God is working in me, in what He would want me to do. Pray that He gives me the direction that I need, so that it is revealed to me what I should do.
This year has practically flown by and I wasn't ready for it. Christmas is less than 5 months away. Hopefully, May 1st(Graduation Day) will come soon. Also, if anyone would like to come visit Ryan and I that would be great. I would love to see some family and friends. More to come this week!
Thank you to everyone that responded, it definitely was a blessing to hear from you! This last week, I have been getting ready for school to start back, I also start my internship for a company called Fostering Hope. This company supports and educates foster care parents, with the help of churches around Colorado Springs. My schedule is going to be rather crazy. I will go to class on Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday nights, and on Tuesday and Thursday and Friday I will have internship. Not only will I have homework, term papers, and projects due, I also have many things to do for the children's ministry at Fusion church called Vertical. So if you could pray that I would not go crazy in the next month or really that I can use my time well, so I am not as stressed that would be great!
At church, we are praying that God would help us reach more people. We have set a goal of 80 to accept the love of Jesus Christ by next year. We want to see God change this community with his love. To meet the people of our community, we have had 5 block parties in many different areas of Fountain Valley. Boy, was it crazy! It was great to meet our neighbors, many of them are wives of deployed soldiers. These women are very brave, I do not know how well I could take Ryan being gone for a year. It is a critical time for our church, please pray that our church will grow and that I will receive new volunteers for Vertical. I really, really need more volunteers.
Also, since I am going to be going to school full time and heading up the children's ministry, Ryan and I with God's help, have decided that it would be best for my sanity and our marriage that I stop working for the university. Please pray that I put all my trust in God and that he will comfort me when things seem like they may fall apart.
This is just some of what I am thinking, dealing, and praying about right now, so more to come in the next week. Thank you for taking the time to read this blog. Love to you all or y'all. ha ha
Over the past week, many things have changed and I would like a way to connect with people who will help me through the next year. Also, during a coaching session last week we were challenged to find a prayer force, people who would pray for me. I thought since most of the people I know and love, have the Internet then, why not start a blog. This way everyone can know exactly what I need prayer for and what is going on in my life and what is going on with Fusion Church. I think I am going to be surprised, in what could happen. So if you have received a link to my blog, please send it to anyone that could pray for me and anyone who may enjoy getting to know me.
Thank you for taking the time to read this!
You can let me know that you are praying for me by commenting on this post and future posts.
God bless,
